There was a chonklit bunnies, but I ated it with my stomach muscles.
Category: food
“That Simpson, he thinks he’s the pope of chili town.”—Chief Wiggum
Good gravy. Guess who’s the three-time winner of his company’s chili cook-off? C’est moi.
Anyone want the recipe?
Rutabaga o’Lantern
In honor of my Gaelic roots, I carved a rutabaga this year. It takes some doing (scooping out the guts isn’t as efficient as it is with a pumpkin), but the end results are creepily worth it. STAY AWAY, EVIL SPIRITS!
New Pop Bottle Acquired in Milwaukee
I wish I knew someone who cared about this shit.
As a Boy I Built Gingerbrick Houses, Because They Were SENSIBLE
So here’s a stupid question, but give me a break, because we never built one in my house when I was growing up. I’m thinking of making one with my wife and son, because it’s fun, and I’m freaking jolly and shit.
After you build a gingerbread house and let it sit around for a few weeks, are you supposed to eat it? Or is it simply intended as a monument to consumerism and folly?
MY PRECIOUSSSSSSSS…
I love my new coffee press. Sorry, I can’t orgasmically discuss its technological aspects, so please don’t “press” me to do so. See what I did there? “Press.”
The note is from wiseacre co-workers who hadn’t seen me for two days because I was hiding in a meeting room proofing a big document—it’s the only way I can get anything done.
