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Oh, Henry!

Wrote this about six years ago. Its message, however, is ETERNAL.

The Gift of the Magi by Way of Mr. Dan Kelly

Biff and Muffy married against their wealthy parents’ wishes and were subsequently disowned and left to survive on their own devices. Still, though they had little but a few sticks of furniture and the clothes on their backs and survived on generic brand gruel, they were in love.

Muffy was famed for her fine black hair, which she had grown since childhood into a long flowing mane. Biff too had a single treasure: his grandfather’s gold pocket watch, which he carried wherever he went. On Christmas Eve, wanting to give her husband a lovely gift, Muffy went to the village wigmaker and had her hair cut off and converted into toupees for the town fathers. Afterwards, she popped by the jewelery store and used the money she’d earned to purchase a platinum watch fob that would look spanking fine on Biff’s watch.

For the purposes of this story’s plot twist, assume that Muffy is wearing a hat and that Biff doesn’t immediately realize she’s as bald as an egg.

“Darling, here is your present. Oh, I love you so very much,” said Muffy.

“A watch fob?” said Biff, “Why, this is wonderful! It will look so smart on my grandfather’s watch”

At that moment, a Christmas partridge flew through the room and knocked off Muffy’s hat, revealing her bald cabeza. Biff gasped.

“My darling, what happened to your hair?”

“I… I… sold it, to buy your present!”

“Gasp! Such sacrifice! Oh you DO love me!” said Biff through tears of joy. “I only wish I had as fine a gift for you as this watch fob.”

“Oh… I see… So, you don’t have anything for me?”

“Good Lord, no. We’re poor, remember? Ah well, it’ll grow back. And hey! I have a new watch fob!”

And he happily attached it to his grandfather’s watch.

The End